To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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