I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
