shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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