Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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