Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
