fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Randomize
