I have demons in me.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
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