Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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