One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
