sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
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