It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize