do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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