all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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