he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Found your dick twin last night
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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