She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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