That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize