Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
