I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
false alarm, still single
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