I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Randomize
