you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
