fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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