I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
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