Dual....:-)
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
