Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Randomize