Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize
