i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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