I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Randomize