this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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