i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
