It's Friday. Sex?
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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