just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
