Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
