i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
