eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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