a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
