Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
