I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
