I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
