Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
