Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Randomize
