Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
wow bdsm is so cute
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