a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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