I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
She bit a glass in half.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
