But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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