After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
