so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
