These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
