Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
he puts the penis in happiness.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
