I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
