i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
