Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize