My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize