I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize